How/Why you should be a Mentor - Mentor Malawi (Mentors Only) Meet-up

I was having a conversation with Dave, earlier today, as I was watching a TedTalk from Malibu by Adam Leipzig on “How to find your life purpose in 5 minutes” – when Dave commented that people, especially motivational speakers tend to oversimplify life.”

I found myself watching TedTalks because, well, I have had a creatively exhausting week – and I simply needed some inspiration to write something that I would share with you today.

I was contacted by Stan about a month or two ago, asking me to become a mentor on this project – and my first thought was “I am sooo busy, I cannot do this”. I genuinely am busy, but not too busy to assist in the best way that I can. Personally, I felt that I would not be contributing best to this project as a mentor as I know that I have a lot of mentees of my own, and I just do so much better in operations and well, talking, as I am to you now.

Today I learnt of the existence of “Intentional” and “Unintentional” mentors. That was when I got to thinking, that I have been a mentor for people younger than me for near 8 years. If you know me, then you’d be question how that is so because I am only 23. Yes I consider that I have been doing mentorship work since I was in my last year of high school. If you are curious – I barely knew the meaning of the word “Mentor” back then.

I really really love knowledge. I love hunting for it. I love finding it. I love sharing it. I hate struggling to find it, and I make it a point to share once I have found it. That was kind of how I ended up writing my book “By the end of your teens”. It was with the desire to mentor many teenagers around the world, using the little that I had – my words.

Now, you applied to be a mentor on this programme. I am curious to know why you did it – and I have a feeling I will learn as the journey progresses.
Life, success, is not as rosy as motivational speakers make it out to be. A mentor goes a step further than a motivational speaker. Getting back to my conversation with Dave – he argued that motivational speakers only give you hope, a little too much home; but they do not give you the tools to navigate problems and face life.

Mentorship, or at least good mentorship, in my view – is helping someone discover their greatest purpose. This requires that as a mentor, you have defined and are quite settled in the pursuit of your greatest purpose.

I wrote a lot about discovering your purpose by the end of your teens in my book; but today I would like to borrow from Adam’s view. Adam says to discover your life purpose – you must ask yourself 5 questions:

1.Who are you?

2. What do you do?

3. Who do you do it for?

4. What do those people want and need?

5. How do those people change/transform as a result?

As a mentor, you are like a sounding board for your mentee. You resound what they are saying, until it is crystal clear to them. You act as a stepping stone, filling the gaps, giving inspiration and basically being whatever they need you to be – to become their greatest self.

Now mentorship is not a job. I mean it can be, but it really is volunteerism. You do not get into mentorship to make profits, otherwise you would be known as an investor – which is okay. But as a mentor, you are a volunteer.

I started volunteer work in 2014 as I recall. I joined the Lions’ Club under the Leo Club when I was still in University. I enjoyed my time doing volunteer work. We did a lot Secondary School talks and visits, and we donated a lot of goods. Last year, 2018, I left Lions Club for various reasons. I still had it in me to serve – but I felt we were not doing enough as givers. We were so obsessed with giving end goods, and not so much sustainable skills. I find it unproductive to give someone something that will run out. I would rather teach the person how to make the product so they can keep making it.

That was when I founded the Nyenyezi ya ku M’mawa which is an incubator that will be working in partnership with Mentor Malawi as we both grow.

So we are here today as mentors – as givers or knowledge and sustainable skills. I know you all are already geniuses in your different fields of endeavors – So my last segment of this talk will just be resounding some briefs about mentorship that I learnt from Lori Hunt’s Ted Talk, this morning – which you possibly already know. The whys and hows to be a mentor.

Mentoring makes you feel good, it helps you stay fit mentally.
Intentional mentoring Seeking opportunities to help others grow.
Unintentional mentoring Being a mentor and not even knowing it. Advising and Leading by example.
Help people to see what they can’t see in themselves.
Give tools to make the right decision Show how to use those tools
+ You don’t have to be old to mentor